Red and Black

Transcriber: closesttopurple

Writer: Jun Eishima
Concept by cavia/YOKO TARO
Translator: Jasmine Bernhardt

Old fan translation.

A normal life comes at the cost of all.

Shadowy hues are valiant, existing on the brink of madness.

As Nier reached down to pluck an egg from the dew-soaked grass, birdsong echoed in the distance, signaling a pleasant day ahead. Looks like this is the last one, he thought. Can't leave any behind when they lay only one a day.

"That all of 'em?"

He turned to see the owner of the chickens coming up a nearby rise. Nier held out the basket to the other man, who took it from him and quickly tallied up the count. "Nice work, boy," the man said. "Oh, and the wife's fever broke, so I think she can go back to collecting eggs after today. Can't thank you enough for everything you've done for us."

"Happy to help," responded Nier.

"I got the payment you asked for, but are you sure don't want money or food or nothing?"

"No, a baby chick is fine. Yonah will love it."

"Well then, pick whichever one you want from the basket."

The man gestured to a gaggle of chicks born the day prior. Nier had no idea how to tell one from the other, so in the end he chose one that seemed especially energetic. As he went to grab it, the chick began running around the basket as if fearing the idea of being separated from its fellow hatchings. But after a couple of stops and starts, he was finally able to cup his hands gently around the animal and head for home.

When Nier had gone to collect the eggs he had been the only villager stirring, but now things were beginning to buzz with the morning energy of merchants and shoppers. As he walked down the street exchanging greetings with various merchants, the owner of a grocery shop called out to him.

"Nier!" she cried. "Hey, hold up. I hear Popola asked you to pick medicinal herbs today, and I'm hoping I can pile on and get you to grab some mushrooms."

Though sudden, such a request was not abnormal. Wild beasts roamed the area outside the village-as well as other, darker things that lurked in the shadows-and people didn't like to stray far from the walls of the town unless the sun was at its zenith. And with only a few hours a day where that was the case, Nier was often the one they turned to for morning or evening adventures.

"Mushrooms? You got it."

"Oh, you are just a delight! When you get back, I'll give you a pumpkin. I just got a big one in that I know your Yonah will love!"

"Sounds great!" replied Nier as he dashed away. He quickly found himself approaching the little brick house where he lived with his sister, Yonah. It was all they had left of their parents, but along with the kindness of the villagers, it had been enough to keep them healthy and happy for some time now. After a second, he spied Yonah waving at him from a window and picked up his pace.

"You're back!" cried Yonah, who burst out from inside the house before Nier could even open the door. Her breath was ragged from having rushed down the stairs.

"I sure am. Also, didn't I tell you not to run around before and after bed?"

"Oh...right."

Yonah was a sickly girl who fell ill when the seasons changed, became feverish if she stayed up later than normal, and started coughing if she moved around too much. She also wasn't much of an eater, and had thrown up her dinners more times than Nier cared to remember.

"I'm sorry. Am I going to start coughing again?"

"You'll be fine so long as you eat your breakfast and behave.

Now let's get inside before we both freeze to death in the wind." As Nier pulled the door shut behind him, he turned to Yonah and smiled. "Oh, hey! I have a present for you."

As his sister squealed with delight, Nier brought his hands up to her ear. The peeps of the chick inside were quiet, but they proved enough to reveal the surprise.

"It's a chick!"

"Yep. Now hold out your hand." He gently placed the chick onto her palm, where it huddled and shivered in shock from the sudden flood of light.

"It's so warm and fluffy," whispered Yonah.

"Yeah, it's still pretty little, so we can keep it in the house until it grows."

"WE CAN?!"

"Sure we can. We used to do that all the time back when Mom was still alive."

Saying this caused Nier to think on the early days of his childhood, when it had been his job to feed the chickens that lived in the garden. Their mother was too busy managing the household to take care of animals, and their father was often away on business in some faraway land-the same place he died not long after Yonah was born.

Nier could barely recall his father's face, and the man's passing had had little effect on the family's daily routine. Their mother raised vegetables in the garden and sewed clothes for the villagers; so far as Nier knew, his mother's hands didn't stop working until the day she died five years ago.

Nier was ten and Yonah not even two when it happened. The evening had begun like any other, with their mother stirring a pot of stew in the kitchen. She turned to Nier and asked him to fetch some bowls from the shelf, then collapsed to the floor with a heavy thud. Unable to comprehend what was happening, he burst from the house and ran to Popola in the library, figuring the woman in charge of all those books would know what to do. But although respect for Popola's wisdom was a sentiment shared by all who lived in the village, she proved unable to help his mother, simply shaking her head when she finished examining the body.

Nier found it hard to accept this most sudden of changes. It had seemed less like life leaving a person and more like an object suddenly breaking. And yet, when he saw the look on Popola's face, he knew without a doubt that his mother was no more.

When Popola's older twin sister, Devola, helped put his mother's body in a casket, Nier felt nothing. When the villagers began preparing for the funeral, Nier felt nothing. It was as if his mind had gone numb. He never even felt an urge to cry until a moment at the service when his eyes began to well up. The pit of his throat began to squeeze shut and his vision went blurry, but he pushed the emotions down because Yonah had started crying herself. Though she wasn't old enough to understand her mother's death, the fact her brother was ready to cry was enough to upset her. But when he smiled down at her, her tears immediately stopped and once he wiped the wetness and snot from her face, she began to smile again.

Both of our parents are gone now, he thought in that moment. Which means I'm the only one who can protect Yonah.

Once they were done with breakfast-simple leftovers from the day before-Nier began preparing to leave again.

"Can I come with you?" Yonah asked. "I want to help.”

The medicinal herbs he needed to collect were most common just outside the eastern gate at this time of year, and he'd taken his sister there before. But before he could answer, she was overcome by a series of short, staccato coughs.

Nier had heard worse, and he felt no fever when he put his hand on her forehead, but the answer was already

"Sorry, Yonah, but no. We can't take the risk of you getting worse overnight."

She appeared dejected, but didn't push the issue as Nier looked on with concern. A fever had left her bedridden just a week prior, and while her temperature had gone down and her appetite was back, the lingering cough still concerned him.

"Look, you can go outside for a bit if you want, okay?" he said in an attempt to make amends. The moment the words escaped his lips, her energy came roaring back.

"Can I go on an errand?!"

"You can buy one onion and one carrot. All right?"

"Can I buy the smallest carrot?”

"What? No. Remember how Popola said carrots are good for you?"

"Fine, I'll eat my carrots. That should cure my fever and my cough, too, right?"

By way of an answer, Nier reached out and patted Yonah on the head before placing a single bronze coin in her hand. Considering he would be paid for the herbs that day, a single coin seemed a reasonable price to make his sister happy. But as she grabbed her shopping basket and dashed out of the house, thrilled to be leaving for the first time in a long while, Nier caught up to her and took her hand.

"I thought you were going to the eastern gate," she said. "I'll go with you to the fountain."

The gentle slope from the house to the fountain made running a tempting option, but past that there were more people about, which made Yonah less likely to bolt. At times like this, he often wondered if he was being overprotective, but made his peace with the matter by reminding himself he didn't want to see his sister in pain.

"Nier, look! Something splashed! Is it a fish?"

As Yonah pointed to the canal with gleaming eyes, Nier readjusted his grip on her hand to ensure she was secure. "The fish in the canals don't jump. Some of the ones in the sea do, but these guys are pretty calm."

"I want to get some water," said Yonah after a second's pause. "Nope. Sorry. Buckets get really heavy when they're filled with water, and I don't want you falling into the canal.”

As said canal was a precious lifeline for the entire village, people could only fish in certain areas and children were not permitted to splash around. This was why the majority of the villagers including Nier and Yonah-didn't know how to swim. If anyone ever fell in the water, there would be no one coming to save them.

"Aw, boo," said Yonah. "I wish I could help you more."

"Hey, you're going on an errand, remember?" Nier reassured her. "That means you are helping."

As Yonah nodded in delight, the soft plucking of strings came drifting on the wind. Soon they saw Devola playing her beloved instrument and singing softly as she sat next to the fountain. Nier couldn't imagine the village without her voice in the background-it would be like having the library without Popola.

Yonah let go of Nier's hand and ran to Devola, and this time he didn't stop her. She looked up to Devola and Popola like they were her mothers or perhaps older sisters and preventing that most innocent of meetings seemed unnecessarily cruel.

"Morning, Yonah!" said Devola as she reached out to pinch the younger girl's cheeks. "Is your fever gone?"

"Yep! And did you know I'm going on an erra—"

Before Yonah could finish, a dry cough exploded from her lungs. Devola looked up at Nier as he approached a few moments later, concern written across her face.

"Her fever went away three days ago, but the cough is still sticking around," he explained.

"Mm, I see. Well, at least it doesn't seem like a bad cough." Devola was right. It wasn't the phlegmy cough Yonah often got with a throat ailment, nor was it the kind that left her wheezing whenever she inhaled. It was a dry, almost weak thing but while his sister didn't seem too bothered by it, the fact she'd never had this particular sort of illness made Nier nervous.

"You should drop by and see Popola when you're done with your errands," Devola suggested. "Last night she made a cough suppressant for the lady that runs the weapon shop, and I bet she has some left over."

Yonah wrinkled her nose as she recalled Popola's bitter medicinal brews. Her dismayed expression caused Devola to laugh. "You know, I bet Popola would be happy to read to you if you drank the whole thing."

"Will she read me the book about the big tree?" "You bet."

"Okay, then I'll go see her. I don't like it, but I'll take her icky medicine and then she has to read to me!" "After your errands, yes?"

"Oh yeah!” cried Yonah. "I'll be right back!"

Devola grinned as the girl spun on a heel and took off for the shopping district, and Nier gave a polite nod before setting off on his own task. He retraced his steps to the house, climbed a steep hill, and soon found himself standing before the eastern gate, where the usual guard was stretching and trying to blink the sleepiness out of his eyes.

"Good morning," said Nier.

"Morning," replied the guard. "And hey, be careful out there today, all right? Word's going 'round that one of the guys spotted a Shade just outside town."

Shades were dark creatures that attacked people indiscriminately, and far more dangerous than any wild beast. The terror they inspired was the reason most people never wanted to leave the safety of the village walls.

"Nice day out, though," the guard added. "So they'll probably leave you be."

Sunlight damaged Shades, which meant they rarely showed themselves on warm, bright days. However, that made dim nooks and thick brush all the more dangerous during cloudy days or when the afternoon moved to evening. Yet because their weakness was to the sun specifically and not merely any light, even the brightest torch had no effect on them. No one knew why this was and in fact, they all had far more questions than answers about Shades. Were they alive? What did they cat? How did they proliferate? Did they have any degree of intelligence? Even these most basic facts were a mystery to all.

Fortunately, Nier had never heard of Shades appearing near the eastern gate. Goats, on the other hand, did. Those grumpy critters were far more temperamental than the sheep on the plains, and a careless approach was likely to be met with both hooves and horns. So as Nier passed through the gate and began gathering his herbs, he made sure to give the grazing animals a wide berth. Someone once told him that people long, long ago used to keep domesticated goats and sheep, but he wasn't sure if that was true. He couldn't imagine raising such creatures like you would a pig or chicken. In fact, he had no idea how you'd keep them calm at all, unless it was through some kind of magic.

While thinking on the past, he remembered how someone once told him the night was pitch black in ages past. He could scarcely believe this, either, but if true, it meant there hadn't been any Shades back then-if the sky went dark after the sun vanished behind the horizon, they would have wiped out humanity in no time. A shudder ran down his spine as he imagined a world that ended in darkness every day, and marveled at how people once went about their lives free from the terror of Shades. He decided to stop his musing there, because there was no point in imagining what things were like long ago; it wouldn't make their lives easier, nor would it make Yonah healthier.

Once his bag was full of herbs and his basket overflowing with mushrooms, he looked down at the shadow at his feet. He was done earlier than expected, and there was still plenty of time before the weak gloam of evening arrived. If he went a bit farther, he could reach the tree that bore Yonah's favorite red fruit. But despite having the time, he decided to head back to the village anyway. For a reason he couldn't put his finger on, he just wanted to be with Yonah today.

"Yonah came and left not too long ago," Popola said with a smile as she took the bag of herbs from Nier. "You just missed her. Honestly, I wish I could have read her another book-but when letters come in, I have to read them. Duty calls and all that."

"It's all right, Popola. I'm sorry she was bothering you while you were working."

Popola's job included a wide array of things. While most of their responsibilities revolved around managing the library, she and Devola were also in charge of all matters concerning life and death in the village and surrounding area. They helped deliver every baby that was born and arranged funerals for every person who died. That, combined with Popola's seemingly endless supply of general knowledge, made her a treasured resource. Whenever trouble visited a community, they dropped everything to send letters and messengers in search of her wisdom.

"Her cough is different this time, isn't it?" asked Popola in an almost offhand way.

Mixed emotions immediately rose up in Nier: anxiety that he'd been right about the oddness of her cough, as well as relief that Popola didn't seem too worried about it.

"I didn't give her a suppressant," she continued. "I thought it better to just keep an eye on her for now."

"I'll be sure she gets to bed early," replied Nier, his mind already whirling with plans. I'll need to feed her soon, then make sure she has enough blankets. After that, I'll have to see she doesn't leave the house tomorrow, and also-

"Enough," chuckled Popola. "I see your gears turning. You're going to end up sick yourself if you worry this much." "But-"

"Seriously, stop. You're doing fine."

Hearing those words brought Nier genuine relief, and he was again struck by how the twins took such a personal interest in Yonah and himself. After leaving the library, he delivered the mushrooms and received a pumpkin in return before heading home. It was an especially sweet variety of pumpkin, and he planned to boil it for dinner, which was one of his sister's favorite meals.

As he approached the house and looked up at the second- floor window, he noticed it was empty. Yonah was always glued to the glass when it was time for him to come home, and seeing it bare caused a horrible feeling to form in his stomach. Screaming her name, he ran to the door and practically kicked it open, only to find her sitting on the floor with a confused look on her face and the baby chick in her hand. A wave of relief almost knocked him off his feet as he realized she hadn't been upstairs because she was caring for the hatchling.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing," muttered Nier as he started to feel silly for picturing his sister collapsed on the floor in the midst of some coughing fit.

"Our little chick ate so much!" Yonah announced as she happily ran a finger over its head before gently placing it back in the basket. "Oh, and Popola said I don't have to take any medicine! She just wants me to stay warm, go to bed early, and..."

As usual, Yonah began rambling on about everything that happened that day, almost as if she wanted to reclaim the time they'd been forced to spend apart. Relieved, Nier let her talk as he set down his things and began preparing a fire in the kitchen. But a moment later, her monologue was interrupted by a dry cough and in an unexpected turn, it didn't stop, but instead began to get worse.

"Easy, Yonah. You're talking too much. Try to stay quiet for a little bit, okay?"

Just as he was about to turn back to his business, he heard a quiet splat like she'd just coughed up her lunch. He whirled around, ready to run over and help, then froze. Yonah's hands were pressed to her mouth, and a thick black fluid was leaking through the fingers. A grim odor, clearly not vomit, filled the air, and it took him a moment to recognize the scent of blood.

"It...hurts..." moaned Yonah. She attempted to stand as tears filled her eyes, but another coughing fit kept her planted on the ground. Globs of dark red blood began to pour from her hands and puddle on the floor, almost as if some creature inside her was attempting to burst out.

As he looked on, a thought forced its way into his mind-a thought of a disease so horrible, it was nicknamed "the Reaper." The Black Scrawl.

"That should keep things calm for now."

Popola's eyes shifted to the door, silently urging Nier to leave the room. Devola, who had stayed by Yonah's side until she finally fell asleep, nodded.

Nier didn't remember exactly what happened after he thought about the Black Scrawl. He knew he ran out of the house with Yonah in his arms, he knew she cried about her back hurting, and he vaguely recalled running into Devola and having her send him back to the house. His first truly clear memory was cleaning up the blood on the floor with Devola, then Popola arriving with medicine. But even though they were the two people he trusted most in the world, their presence did nothing to stop his anxiety.

When our father died, Mom was still around. And when Mom died, Yonab and I bad each other. But what happens if Yonah dies? He was unable think beyond that, it was as if his thoughts were being swallowed by a dark and bottomless abyss.

"Why Yonah?" Nier asked a little later when it was just him and Popola alone on the first floor. "Is it because I didn't take good enough care of her? Was my food bad?"

"Of course not. You take very good care of her, and you feed her quite well

"Then is this...is this Mom's...?"

His voice quivered and the question died in the air, but his mind was more than happy to finish it for him: Is this Mom's fault? The Black Scrawl had killed their mother without warning five years before, but it was a long time before Popola revealed this information. Their mother apparently didn't think her children would understand, so she'd kept her symptoms hidden and continued to push herself without pause until the very end.

"This is no one's fault," Popola had said at the time. "While it's true no one knows the cause of the Black Scrawl, it isn't a genetic condition, nor is it contagious. There's also no relationship between it and constitution or lifestyle, so it's not unusual for perfectly healthy people to contract it."

Nier suddenly stopped musing on the past and stared at it?"

Popola. "Did you know?" he asked. "Did you know Yonah had He suspected one of the sisters knew, especially since Devola was the one who told them to visit Popola when she heard Yonah's cough. But then Popola opted not to give her a suppressant, saying they would keep an eye on her instead. So maybe she knew normal medicine wouldn't help at all.

"I hoped I was wrong," she replied in a whisper. "But Devola and I have seen so many cases of the Black Scrawl now that I...I just..."

"What's going to happen to her?"

Nier couldn't bring himself to ask the real question on his mind: How long will she live? He knew the Black Scrawl was fatal, and that no drug or treatment could cure it. The Black Scrawl scared everyone, which is why everyone knew a thing or two about it. After it claimed his mother, he found himself listening carefully whenever adults started talking about it.

"It's different for everyone," began Popola, "but the fevers, cough, and pain will last for a while. Some people complain about aching in their arms or legs, but since Yonah said her back is hurting, that means her pain is coming from her bones."

Popola went on to explain how the pain would eventually spread through the entire body, rendering Yonah bedridden. Even lying motionless would not dull her agony, and each time she coughed up blood, the symptoms would grow worse. The description made Nier's heart clench as he thought about how their mother had managed to bear such agony while still greeting them every day with a smile.

"Once you see black writing appear on the body, it means the end is close," finished Popola sadly. "I'm sorry. I truly am."

"There must be something we can do," said Nier. He knew it was a stupid sentiment, but that was precisely why he felt the need to bring it up.

"We can manage the pain somewhat with medicine, but as for a cure..."

"Then let's stop the pain. We'll worry about the rest later." He couldn't stand the idea of his sister suffering, so if there was a way to take that away, he was more than happy to pursue it. But Popola quickly brought him back to earth with a small shake of the head.

"That medicine isn't something we have on hand, nor is it a thing we can make by scavenging materials that grow around the village like we do with our cough and fever cures."

Which means it's going to be expensive, thought Nier. Since he was the one who gathered materials for the village, Popola usually gave him medication whenever he needed it. That clearly would not be the case this time.

"But still...it's Yonah."

Popola, looking woeful, cast her eyes downward and said nothing more.

This is Yonah, and I'll do anything for her.

Nier's sentiment as Yonah's older brother was genuine, but reality was not so forgiving.

He was able to purchase the first order of painkillers by draining their savings. After their mother died, Nier found letters from their father along with a small pile of coins. He never touched the money, instead saving it for the day they absolutely needed it—which was likely the reason their mother hadn't spent it either. Meager as they were, having emergency funds around proved reassuring so much so that when Popola first told him the painkillers were expensive, he knew he would manage somehow.

When he finally got the first order, he was pleasantly surprised at how well they worked. They did nothing for Yonah's low-grade fever or cough, but those had been light to begin with. In fact, the cough caused by the Black Scrawl wasn't as bad as the one she got when the seasons changed, which often kept her up all night for days on end. So as long as the pain of the Black Scrawl was held at bay, the physical burden on her was practically absent.

But this was only a temporary reprieve; once they ran out of medication, the pain would return with teeth and talons bared. Sadly, sooner than he ever imagined possible, they had drained the last coin of their savings.

"Are you going out already?" asked Yonah as she sat up in bed and rubbed her eyes. Nier had done his best to get ready without making any noise, but she had sensed his movement anyway.

"I'm picking royal ferns today, so I need to leave early. Now go back to sleep."

"Are you going out to where the scary sheep are?" she demanded as her face clouded over. She knew royal ferns were abundant in the northern plains, along with Shades and the surprisingly terrifying wild sheep.

"I'm sorry," she continued. "This is all because I'm sick. That's why you have to"

"Don't worry about me. No sheep could ever beat your big brother. Remember when I brought home that mutton?" He left out the fact he'd been with an adult from the village at the time, and that the sheep had already been weakened from a trap. "Besides, I'm only going to pick ferns today, but I promise to bring some mutton home soon."

This wasn't merely a lie to make her feel better-he truly was stronger and faster than he had been a year ago. In fact, if he had a real weapon, he could likely take down as many sheep as he wanted. Acquiring such a thing, however, was a challenge currently beyond his means.

"I'll be back later," he said with a smile. Yonah raised her hand to wave goodbye and wish him luck, but the gesture was stopped short by another cough.

Nier quickly made his way to the southern gate. Most of the villagers were still asleep at this hour, and the market street was nearly deserted. For a long while, the only sounds were the echo of his own footsteps, but then he made out the faint creak of the waterwheel and some clucking hens. He figured the chicken keeper's wife was probably out collecting eggs, and a moment later, his guess was rewarded by the sight of a familiar face by the gate.

"Good morning!" he called from several paces away, making sure not to accidentally crush any eggs hiding in the tall grass.

"Heya, Nier!" replied the chicken keeper's wife. "Another early morning for you?"

"Sure is. Speaking of, I was wondering if you had any work for me?" Nier needed as many jobs as he could handle in order to afford Yonah's medicine, so he'd made a habit of asking any passing villager if they could use a spare hand.

"Sorry, but we've got things sorted for now," said the woman in an apologetic tone. She and her husband never raised more chickens than they could handle between the two of them- not that the grasses and bugs in the area could support a great number of chickens anyway. If they got more, they'd have to go out of their way to buy feed, and they didn't have the money for that kind of expense.

"Actually, you know what? If you ever get a job that takes you to Seafront, pick up some seashells for me, okay?"

Seafront was a long way to go for a single errand, and not a place Nier was very fond of. While he'd only been there once, the experience had given him some very unpleasant memories.

"Why shells?" he asked in an attempt to hide his discomfort. "I heard that feeding crushed shells to chickens helps 'em lay better eggs."

"Well, I'll be sure to pick some up if I get a job out that way, but it will probably be a little bit."

"Oh, sure, no rush. Just whenever you happen to be in the area."

Their chat complete, he continued down the empty market street to the northern gate, where he discovered one of the two guards on duty. As always, Nier asked if there was work available, but the guard only gave a troubled shake of the head.

"Sorry, no," he said. "But I'll ask anyone who passes through for you, so stop by on your way back."

"Thank you."

"Sure thing. Wouldn't expect too much, though."

The guard's warning was understandable, for while the villagers were all kindhearted, theirs was a particularly destitute hamlet. The scrap wheat and tiny river fish that served as chicken feed and bait in other towns were precious sources of food in the town. In addition to lacking food, most people didn't have the financial leeway to hire workers, which meant jobs were in incredibly short supply. Even the villagers who were comparatively better off had their hands full paying for basic tailoring and mending fees. If you didn't run a shop, work a farm, or guard a gate, your only option was to look elsewhere-which is what sent Nier's father far afield.

This meant the jobs Nier took were essentially charitable errands that could be completed in exchange for food or pocket change. While the villagers knew how hard it was to make money based on such tasks, they recognized a fifteen-year-old wasn't going to be hired on in a larger town. Nier was painfully aware of all of this, and desperate to grow up as fast as possible. Because at the rate things were going, he wouldn't have money to eat tomorrow, much less pay for medicine.

He spent half the day picking royal ferns before returning to the village. As predicted, the guard who asked passersby about work opportunities had come up empty. After thanking him, Nier decided to speak with Devola, who spent a good deal of time singing in the village tavern and chatting with folks who needed to blow off steam. She wasn't the voice of wisdom her sister was, but she was always willing to lend an ear and a shoulder-which made her keenly aware of who was looking for help at any given time. When Nier asked about work, however, Devola could only frown.

"Sorry, Nier, but I've got nothing. Oh, but I did just come across an old lady looking to buy a house! She said her son and daughter-in-law are coming home after being away for a while." Nier blinked. "Devola, wait. Are you suggesting...?"

"It wouldn't be so bad! There are plenty of empty rooms in the library, so the two of you would always have a place to sleep." Nier had never considered selling the house. While it was old and small and probably wouldn't command much of a price, it was still money that would free him from the worry of not being able to afford Yonah's medicine for a while.

"At least think about it?" Devola suggested.

Considering their savings were depleted, Nier knew the smart thing to do was nod in affirmation, sell the house, then ask Popola to let them stay at the library. But while he understood the logic, he still couldn't bring himself to agree. Yonah spent nearly all her time in their house because of how sickly she was, and it was special to her. It was also the only connection she still had to their late mother, seeing as they had sold her old clothes and personal effects to buy medicine. The house was all they had left to remind them of her, and he just couldn't bring himself to sell it.

"Yeah, I don't know if..."Unable to finish his sentence, Nier trailed off and hung his head.

"No, of course not," replied Devola. "That's fine. Don't worry about it."

Nier was happy he didn't need to explain himself at length, and pleased that Devola and Popola understood his family better than anyone. "I'm sorry. I know you brought it up because you were trying to help."

"No, I'm sorry! I had a feeling you were going to say no." With no more work to do and nothing set for tomorrow, Nier felt his heart growing heavy. Sighing, he pushed open the weighty tavern doors and left. On his way home, he saw a young mother dragging a child behind her and berating him, which only brought his mood lower. He had a suspicion the local mothers forbade their children from playing by Nier's house lest they catch Yonah's Black Scrawl.

The villagers all knew the disease couldn't be passed from one person to another, so they treated Nier as they always had when Yonah was diagnosed-but that didn't mean they weren't scared. For while they were told the Black Scrawl wasn't contagious, everyone had more questions than answers. What if it could be passed on in rare instances? Why did it affect some people and not others? All the uncertainty surrounding the Black Scrawl served to muddle what few truths they had.

It was why their own mother chose to hide her condition— not only for the sake of her children, but out of fear she would stop receiving even the smallest of jobs. No matter how much the pain plagued her, she decided it was better than not being able to support her family.

Nier wondered how things would have turned out if the villagers had learned the true cause of her death. Would they have been as kind to him and Yonah? Would that kindness remain now that Yonah had the very same illness? And was a simple warning not to play by their house the worst of it, or was there more to come?

As Nier pondered such things, another thought suddenly occurred to him: When was the last time I watered the garden?

With all their money going to medicine, they had nothing to spare for food. He knew their yard had been a vegetable patch when their mother was alive, so he'd weeded it, dug up fresh earth, and scattered what few seeds he had-but how long ago had that been now?

Please let there be time, he prayed as he ran. When he reached their house, he vaulted over the crumbling wall that protected the patch, then fell to his knees when he saw how the few leaves that had managed to emerge on the sprouts had all withered and died. As his mind reeled, he remembered how obsessive his mother had been about watering the garden. Though she was happy to leave the chickens to Nier, she never let him near the garden, likely because she knew how hard it was to grow things in poor soil. But his day had begun early today, yesterday he had been running errands from morning to night, and the day before that had been the same. With all the work, the garden had simply slipped his mind.

Maybe it just wasn't possible for two children to live without support in a poor village like this. Maybe his only choice was to sell the house. After all, they had already sold off everything else they could.

No. Not everything.

That's right. He did have something else to sell-one last thing. As he considered this, he found himself unable to stand, almost as if a terrible weight had settled on his back. He needed to get inside, feed Yonah, give her the medicine, and prepare for tomorrow. But though his list of tasks cried out for attention, his body simply would not obey.

"Where are you going today?" asked Yonah. She could tell he was going somewhere far away based on his clothing, and the nervousness in her voice was palpable.

"I've got an errand in Seafront," he said as Yonah clung to his coat suspiciously. "The chicken lady said her birds lay better eggs if she grinds shells into their feed, so she asked me to go get some. Honestly, I'm still not convinced chickens can eat shells."

It wasn't a lie and secretly, he was glad he'd encountered the chicken lady the day before. Regardless, Yonah refused to let go of his coat.

"Is that all?"

"Huh? No, I've got other jobs! Seafront's too far away to run over there just for shells. You know the lady at the flower shop? She wanted me to buy her some tulip bulbs they only sell out there."

Now that was a lie-no one else had asked him for anything. He knew he was talking too much and too quickly, but he couldn't stop. He had a feeling that if he didn't pile lie upon lie, Yonah would see right through him.

"Oh, and then the man at the material shop asked for―" "It sounds like you've got too many errands to come home tonight, huh?"

Nier felt a wave of relief when he saw her head drop. She hadn't seen through his lies-she was just sad. She'd probably remembered the last time she spent the night alone six months ago and felt uneasy. While he hated to make her stay alone, Seafront was a long way away-not to mention that the Southern Plains between there and here were home to a fearsome Shade, making midday the only safe time to travel. No matter how urgent his business, getting there and back in a day was simply not possible.

"You stayed by yourself once before, remember?" he reminded her. "You're a lot more grown up now than you were then. Besides, staying here and making sure everything runs smoothly is an important job."

She finally seemed to accept this and released her hold on his coat. He turned away from her uneasy expression, closed the door behind him, and began to run without looking back. He was afraid if he stopped he wouldn't be able to push himself any further, so he ran and he ran until his breath finally gave out. When he stopped, the village was already out of sight, so he slowed his pace and began measuring each breath.

He needed to conserve his energy in case he bumped into a Shade at some point in his journey. The only way to survive an encounter with one was to run as fast as you could the moment you saw it in the distance.

Soon he found himself on the outskirts of the Southern Plains, home of the massive Shade. Since he'd been here before, he knew just how much distance he needed to keep and exactly which places were safe to stop and rest. Despite that, he found himself much more nervous than he was last time.

Said time was a mere six months ago, when he got his first job sending him to Seafront. He was asked to deliver an urgent letter to someone in the city, buy tulip bulbs, and pick up some natural rubber. He'd been a bundle of nerves at the prospect of leaving Yonah by herself, and when he saw the massive Shade in the distance, he started running across the plains as fast as his legs would carry him.

Upon reaching the city, he saw the ocean for the first time in his life. Though it was beautiful, the fishy odor that lay over the city proved too much for him. His hair and skin grew sticky as he walked around, making him feel disgusting. It was only after speaking to the woman at the flower shop that he learned the sea breeze caused this discomfort.

Once he had the bulbs and other materials, Nier ventured into a district full of large houses to deliver the letter. The streets weaved around like a maze while buildings blocked every sight line, making it hard get his bearings. When he finally managed to make the delivery, he realized he had no idea how to get back out again. And either due to the time of day or because residents simply didn't like going outside, there was no one to ask for directions. After a number of exhausting dead ends, he finally sat down by the gate of a large house.

"Whatcha doing there, kid?" came a man's sudden sharp voice from the direction of the house.

Thinking he was being scolded, Nier scuttled away from the in a panic. "Not from around here, are you?" continued the voice. "You lost?" gate

Relief coursed through him as he realized he could finally ask someone for directions, which is why his guard was lowered when the man stepped through the gate, and why he answered honestly when the owner of the voice asked if he was alone. A moment later, a wolfish grin flashed across the man's face. Nier stumbled back, but the man grabbed his arm-he was so strong threw a hand over his mouth, and began dragging him into the house.

"You want some money? Huh, kid?"

The whisper in Nier's ear sent chills rocketing through his body. He used every ounce of strength to shake himself free, and as he ran away, he heard the man behind him laughing and laughing and laughing.

"Come back when you want money, kid!"

His desire to escape the voice was overwhelming, so he ran as fast and as far as he could. And once he reached the shoreline, he still kept running, because the voice seemed to follow him no matter how far away he was.

After he returned home, the echo of the man's laughter gradually faded from his mind. Nier had little cause to go to Seafront incidental errands for the villagers if anything-and over the next six months the unpleasant incident was forgotten.

But now, as Seafront slowly came into view, Nier's steps grew heavy. Maybe I'll get lost again, he thought. Maybe I won't be able to find the house. But in a terrible twist of fate, the residence he was looking for sat right next to the town's main entrance.

He stopped to consider the home. It was nice-quite nice, actually-which meant the owner must be a man of some means. The moment that thought crossed his mind, the sickening laugh replayed in his head and his legs shook.

You can't go back, you know. Once you step across the threshold... He realized he was looking for an excuse, any excuse, to turn back. Just forget about everything, he told himself. We've had enough you have had enough. You can't burden yourself like this anymore. But if I turn back now, what happens to Yonah?

Yonah had been Nier's emotional support ever since their mother's passing. When he thought about what to feed her tomorrow, it gave him an excuse to ignore the distant, uncertain future. When he was busy caring for her, he could forget their mother wasn't around anymore. Though still a child himself, his younger sister gave him the strength to work hard and carry on.

"This is for Yonah," he murmured as he slowly pushed the gate wide.

Yonah remained in a state of remission in the weeks after Nier returned from Seafront. While she still had a cough, it was no longer accompanied by blood-and with her pain gone, her appetite came back. She even managed to feed their chicken outside and spend some time in the library. Yonah only expressed loneliness and unease when Nier made his trips to Seafront every few days, but she was all smiles the rest of the time.

It was good. Everything was good. Nier had brought Yonah's joy back, and now he was focused on keeping her safe. That was all he needed, even if it did feel like more and more of him broke off and blew away every time he got the money to buy her medicine.

Nier walked through his village as those thoughts swirled in his mind. This always happened when he came home from Seafront, and he wished more than anything that he could simply empty his mind like a sieve and sleep. But somewhere, somehow, the road back home had become much more painful than the journey there.

Dazed, he thought he heard someone call his name and turned around to find Devola, who he hadn't realized was at the fountain.

"Hey there," she said. "You okay? You sick?"

Nier shook his head. He wasn't sick-only very, very tired. "Just thinking," he said eventually.

Devola gave him her usual grin, but for some reason he found it utterly stifling. "Hey, if you say so. Oh, and I meant to tell you that I love how you're tying your hair up now!"

"Yeah, it was getting in the way," he said, leaving out the part about how he'd started wearing it like this since that time.

"So practical," said Devola as she reached out to pat him on the head. It was a simple act, one she'd done hundreds of times since they were little, and his rational mind understood this. But as her hand landed on his hair, memories of the previous night came flooding back and he smacked it away with all his strength.

He'd hated his hair ever since he started going to Seafront- and not just having it touched, but having it touch him. It was such a sickening sensation, and each time it happened, memories came flooding of the man grabbing his hair, as well as what came after. No matter how he tried to forget, the memories always returned, and with them came a pain that was etched into every crevice of his being. He'd considered shaving his head, but knew people would want to know why, and he couldn't come up with a good answer. Not to mention that every time it came up, the memories would rise with it. Eventually, he just decided to tie it up so it wouldn't touch him, which was the best solution he could come up with.

"Sorry," said Nier in a voice so hoarse and dry he hardly recognized it as his own. He knew he should say something, spout some explanation to ease Devola's suspicion, but nothing would come.

"Oh, that's my fault!" she replied, cheerfully oblivious. "You don't want me mussing up your new do, huh?"

She lifted her hand back to her instrument and prepared to play, but then stopped. "Oh, right. Popola was asking for you, so swing by before you go home... And, Nier?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't push yourself too hard, okay?"

Nier gave a vague smile. He appreciated Devola's concern about how exhausted he was, but he valued her ignorance even more. If she ever found out, she wouldn't be this considerate. Instead, she would begin to look at him with contempt, like he was an undesirable piece of filth.

When he found Popola, he wondered if she would ask after his health as well or remind him to take it easy. But instead, she simply said, "I have a job for you."

That breezy, almost casual statement felt like salvation; right now, he much preferred being treated with indifference over worry or sympathy.

"But it's extremely dangerous," continued a hesitant Popola. "I'm not even sure if I should be asking you to take it on, but..." "What is it?"

"Killing Shades."

An image of the enormous black mass in the Southern Plains appeared in his mind. It was folly to think a single person could keep that thing contained, much less slay it-yet he agreed to the offer without hesitation.

"You won't be alone, of course," Popola said. "There should be three others joining you from other areas around here, which makes you the fourth."

She went on to explain that the job was to exterminate one of the Shade dens in the northern plains. Thankfully, the creatures involved were all small, so even amateurs had a good chance of coming back successful.

"The other hunters are adults, and I don't think these Shades are particularly strong, but..."

But we're still fighting Shades, thought Nier. He would have to be ready for a minor injury, or perhaps a major one. And of course, there was always the possibility he wouldn't come back at all, which was likely why Popola was so hesitant. Still, Nier knew exactly what he wanted.

"I'll go, Popola. The more Shades there are in the northern plains, the more danger for the village. Besides, I need money for Yonah's medicine."

And the job keeps me away from Seafront.

"In that case, you're hired. Oh, and I promise that the pay will more than match the risk."

When she told him how much he'd be earning, Nier almost couldn't believe his ears. How many times would he have to go to that man's house to earn the same amount? How many times would he have to endure humiliation?

"The risk is fine. I'll do it."

"Just please take care of yourself, all right?"

There was a dark cast to Popola's eyes as she said this. It wasn't sadness or pain, nor was it sympathy or compassion. But the moment Nier saw it, he realized that she knew and likely Devola as well. They knew how he was getting money to pay for Yonah's medicine, and they knew the true cost of such actions. And once they found out, they arranged for a job with a salary that dwarfed his current earnings, despite knowing the dangers that came with it.

The moment he realized this, his face went hot with shame. Yet at the same time, he was thankful the two of them had continued to treat him as they always did. Why did he think they would scorn him? They would never do such a thing.

"Thank you, Popola," he said finally. But despite how much he meant it, the darkness never left her eyes.

Their village was small and rarely visited by outsiders, so when Nier saw two strange men standing by the northern gate, he knew they were his companions on the job. But the newcomers had clearly not been told they would be fighting with a young boy, and their brows furrowed as he walked up to them.

"Go home, son," said one. "This is no game." "I know that, but―"

"I'm serious. Get lost. I don't wanna lose sleep because some boy gets torn apart in front of me."

Nier didn't want to lose this rare opportunity-he had to do something, anything, to be part of the operation. But just when he was about to defend himself, a familiar voice rang out behind him.

"What's all the fuss about, eh?"

Nier didn't even need to turn to know who was speaking-it was a voice he would have recognized anywhere.

"Well, well, well! Look who's here. I forgot you're from this village, kid."

It was the Seafront man, and if Nier had any questions as to what he was doing here, the blade hanging from his hip quickly dispelled them. He'd seen a myriad of different swords in the man's house; he spared no expense in his collection and often bragged about how each one held a trace of murder. Of course a monster like him would have equally monstrous hobbies.

The Seafront man already seemed acquainted with the other two. As they talked among themselves, Nier learned the trio often worked together on jobs like that-jobs where the Seafront man could put his collection to practical use.

"You know this boy?" asked one of the other men.

"Oh, we know each other real well," the Seafront man said with a leer. "Don't worry, he won't get in the way-he's got enough strength to push a grown man around, and fast little legs too."

He was clearly speaking of the moment they first met. Nier looked away, disturbed, which only amused the man further. He leaned in close, trying hard to keep his face in view, and said, "He's got a face like a girl, but he's fierce. And he's good at toughing things out."

Nier's arms and legs stiffened and refused to obey him. He couldn't even shake off the hand resting on his shoulder in an overly familiar fashion.

"I got a feeling he might end up being surprisingly useful. 'Course personally, I wanna see him shake and cry the moment the first Shade shows up."

"Well, if you say so," one of the other men said. "I guess we can bring him along."

The man Nier couldn't hate enough had now enabled him to keep his job. What could be more humiliating?

This is for Yonah. This is all to keep her safe.

He was repeating that mantra to himself and clenching his fists when he felt a sudden grip on the back of his head.

"What's with that look, kid?"

Grip was the wrong word-it wasn't tight enough for that. Yet it froze Nier in place all the same.

"I told you not to go tempting anyone else, remember?"

His voice was low enough that the others couldn't hear, his hot, sticky breath clinging to Nier's ear like poison. He felt new strength come into the fingers toying with his hair, and a moment later, it came loose and fell to his shoulders as the man danced away with a laugh. When Nier stooped down to pick up the fallen hair tie, he realized he couldn't stop his hands from shaking.

The Shade den had been spotted along the mountain range facing the plains. People had known for a long while about the cave at the end of the narrow, winding path, and it made sense Shades would live there, considering their hatred for sunlight.

By the time they pushed into the mountains, the tension in Nier's arms and shoulders was constant. This was his first time holding a sword since he went hunting with adults from his village-but while he'd wielded a dull blade suitable for taking down small animals that time, he now held an old, one-handed sword Popola found in the library storeroom. He didn't know how to look for traces of homicide on the blade, but the dark glint of the steel told him it had drawn blood more than once. Yet despite the weapon's ominous air, it felt perfectly comfortable in his hands, almost as if it had been waiting for him.

"The wind is oddly damp," said the man leading the way. The moment he did, Nier realized the air was indeed cool and heavy, much like how it felt before a rain. Yet when he looked up, the sky was a brilliant, cloudless blue.

"Let's get this business done and go home," the man continued. "Don't wanna get caught in some downpour."

With some way to go before the cave, the group's pace quickened. Even though there were no clouds in the sky, it wasn't unusual for the weather to change without warning. A few minutes later, the group realized the damp wind wasn't portend-ing rain, but fog, and they soon found themselves unable to see the color of the sky anymore.

"Should we head back and try again later?" asked one. "Fog won't matter once we reach the cave," said the other. "Let's just hurry up and... Oh damn! Shades!"

The group screeched to a halt as several black silhouettes emerged from the white mist. They whirled around to find several more approaching from the rear. They were surrounded, and by far more Shades than any of the men had expected to find. Suddenly it dawned on them: Shades thrived not just in caves, but in any area without sun. The foggy, narrow mountain paths were a perfect breeding ground for the creatures.

"These Shades weren't just living in a cave..." breathed the man in front. "This whole area belongs to them!" "Look sharp! They're coming!"

As the dark silhouettes rushed at them, Nier swung his sword, letting the weight carry his momentum forward. The impact raced through the weapon and up to his hands, reminding him of what it was like when he killed a sheep. A moment later, warm blood splashed across him-blood with the same acrid scent as the liquid Yonah coughed up. It was Nier's first time seeing a Shade bleed, and it caused him to hesitate.

While Shades looked like shadows, they tore apart like flesh when attacked, and bled the same red blood as any living creature. The only difference was that they didn't leave a corpse behind upon death, instead vanishing into a dark mist with just a small puddle of red left to let the world know they had ever been there at all.

What are these things?

This wasn't the time for questions, so Nier quickly shoved the thought aside and focused. Though the Shades were indeed small and weak, they were great in number, and he soon found himself falling into a kind of trance where his only thoughts were swinging his sword and watching the blood fly. Yet no matter how many he killed, they continued to pour out of the mist. Things with heads. Hands. Feet. Upright gaits. In fact, the more he slaughtered, the more they came to resemble humans, and he soon lost track of whether he was cutting down people or Shades. Were these members of his species? Was this sticky red liquid actually human blood?

When conscious thought finally returned, he found himself standing beside the Seafront man. So engrossed was he in testing his prized blade he didn't notice Nier. There was a faint smile on his face, and the blood that covered him head to foot made him look less a man than a monster.

Nier stared at him, wondering if he'd been wearing the same expression himself right until that moment. There was no question he had been killing Shades with a smile on his face or that a secret piece of his heart had reveled in the slaughter. He even felt a bit of pride that he'd managed to take down so many of the creatures in succession. So who were the real monsters here? The Shades? Or them?

The mist grew even thicker as they continued their grim work.

Nier's mind was numb. His thoughts a jumble. He'd lost count of how many Shades he'd killed, but he knew that the area seemed to be cleaned out. Exhaling loudly, he turned and began heading back the way he'd come.

While he hadn't been seriously injured, he was covered in scrapes and bruises, and there was a dull pain radiating across most of his body. The blood on his arms and legs had dried, pulling his skin tight when he moved. He was also certain he smelled terrible, but couldn't confirm that as he'd long since grown accustomed to the odor. He wanted to wash himself off as soon as possible, but lacking the energy to run, he settled for walking as fast as he could.

As the mist finally melted away, he caught up to the men who'd tried to send him away back at the gates. One was dragging his leg behind him, and the other's left arm was twisted in an unnatural direction. Seeing them, Nier couldn't help but think how lucky he was to escape with the few injuries he had.

When the two men saw him approaching, their eyes widened in shock. "You're alive!" cried one. "I honestly never expected to see you again."

As Nier nodded in response, the man continued. “You were real impressive out there, you know that? Weren't in the way at all, and you practically had energy to spare. Our friend was right about you for sure."

Suddenly, the expression on the man's face clouded. "Wait, where is our buddy, anyway? Isn't he with you?"

This time, Nier shook his head, which caused the man to let out a grievous sigh. "I was afraid of that. We had no idea there'd be that many of 'em, so it's basically a small miracle any of us are alive-especially you, seeing as you're still so young. I imagine it was pretty rough out there for you, huh?"

"It was fine," said Nier. "I did it for my sister."

It was true. He did it for her, and he would continue to do anything for her. No matter how dangerous the job or dirty the act, he would keep doing what was necessary to keep her healthy and alive.

“Well, I'm just glad you're okay," said the man with the injured arm. He gave Nier a friendly slap on the back, then offered a shoulder to his friend as the three of them began the long journey home.

Nier remained silent as they walked through the mountain path and cut across the plains. They moved carefully, knowing none of them were in any shape to fight off even a single Shade, and grateful that luck had decided to bless them with a bright, sunny afternoon.

As he walked, Nier suddenly though about the massive Shade he'd seen in the Southern Plains. It had hands and feet, and it had walked upright.

"I never knew Shades were so similar to people," he thought out loud.

He used to call the creatures "shadow monsters" when he was younger, since a shadow was exactly what it looked like when he saw his first real Shade. But not for a moment had he ever made a connection between them and actual people.

The two men tilted their heads in response to Nier's statement, so Nier elaborated. "I mean, you cut them and they bleed. Plus, the way it feels when you hit one...”

"Heh," said one of the men. "You might as well point out that goats and sheep bleed and all that when you cut 'em. Hacking apart Shades didn't feel particularly different."

The two men laughed at Nier's odd thought, then one continued talking. "Killing an actual person might feel different from doing it to Shades and sheep, but that's not something you can just test out."

"Well..."

Nier stopped to look down at the dried blood caked on his hands. The color gave no indication of whether the source was human or Shade. The Seafront man was dead, and he would never go to his house again.

"You okay there, son? Something hurt?"

The question snapped Nier back to reality. He looked up from his hands and shook his head. "Just thinking about how I need to get home."

He pictured Yonah at the second-floor window, waiting for him to return and greeting him with a smile like always. There was nothing else he needed to think about besides keeping her safe, which meant his life would be an easy one now.

He felt a great weight lift from his shoulders as he looked up at the sky. It was the same shade of blue it always had been, and as he watched, a single fluffy cloud drifted slowly.

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